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.. Scénář - 23. epizoda - Sever (North) ..

[In a small airport somewhere in Canada: Fraser sits playing Solitaire Ray fiddles with a salt cellar, Hamish, the airport guy, pours him self a cup of coffee]

Ray: All right one more cup and I plug him.

Fraser: You're only making it worse, Ray.

Ray: He's been on the same page for an hour now. Can we get some service over here?

Fraser: You know Ray, things move at their own pace in small places.

Ray: I would just like to check in Okay? Is there something wrong with that? Can I check in please?

Doug: Hey Hamish How's it going?

Hamish: Plane's out front. Hi Doug.

Ray: What the hell is this?

Hamish: Ted, how's it going, Junior.

Ray: I didn't hear anyone ask for tickets.

Fraser: Ray, Ray, Ray.

Ray: I give up 2 weeks vacation in Miami for this.

Fraser: Well as I recall it was your idea.

Ray: No As I recall I said maybe as in maybe we should go up north and fix up your father's cabin. You on the other hand could have said no.

Fraser: Well you don't have to do this.

Ray: Oh yes I do because it's like a ... what do you call it... a death bed confession... you have to honor it... Besides where else but Canada can I spend 2 weeks hard labor living off the land.

Fraser: Well I for one am glad we're going.

[Hamish signals to them]

Ray: Finally. All right you check us in and I'm going to take these bags to the plane.

Hamish: No.

Ray: I've got to weigh in first?

Hamish: Yeah.

Ray: I was sitting there an hour doing nothing and now you want me to weigh in. Lets weigh them in Mr. Funny Hat.

[He dumps a lot of bags on the scales. and Fraser adds his]

Fraser: And mine. Alarm rings on the scale.]

Ray: What? So they're a little over: big deal... Oh I see.. I see... Here you go how much? [gets out a handful of bills]

Hamish: Ah you're American.

Fraser: From Chicago.

Hamish: Yeah. Right, Well you'll have to leave some of these behind, boys.

Ray: Fine [He tosses Fraser's small bag from the scale.]

Hamish: No a lot more than that by the looks of it.

Ray: What about those hunters, hunters, hunters had huge bags, what about them?

Hamish: Oh they're different.

Ray: How are they different?

Hamish: They're just different.

Ray: I know how they're different, they're Canadian and I'm American. That is how they're different. Are you discriminating against me bec Fraser, Cop Hostages. Bodies on the tarmac, CNN. This is not happening to me. You got to get him to turn this plane round right away.

Fraser: You're right. On the other hand, there could be a struggle, he might refuse to co operate and in which case we have to fly this plane ourselves. Now that might be possible with some assistance from air traffic control, and I did read a flight training manual in my grandmother's library. There were a couple of pages missing, but I'm sure nothing vital. And I'm guessing that there are a lot of similarities between a Sopwith Camel and toady's light aircraft.

Ray: Yeah that's great Fraser, just give me the odds.

Fraser: Well statistically, over 90% of all light aircraft fatalities occur during take off and landing.

Ray: Hey I'm not going to be guest of honor at a human pinata party in the Baha.

Fraser: Well Ray, on a brighter note, over 50% of all crash victims crawl away with three out of four limbs intact. 1,2--

[Jim jumps out of plane with a parachute... Plane is going down... Fraser rushes to the controls.]

Ray: The radio!

Fraser: It's broken, sit down.!

Fraser: Strap yourself in. Hold on! [plane is going down]

[See Jim hanging from a tree in his parachute. He releases himself. Cut to Fraser and Ray in a forest.]

Ray: We should stay by the plane.

Fraser: If you think.

Ray: This is insane. You're dragging us through hundreds of miles of wilderness, heading God knows where.

Fraser: Ray, the man is a viscous murder, he killed our pilot, he undoubtedly killed his police escort and he tried to kill us.

Ray: Which is why we should stay by the plane and wait for reinforcements to come.

Fraser: The emergency equipment, the ELT and the radio were all destroyed in the crash. The plane's under cover of trees, it will never be found. Now on the way down I noticed a river. There's bound to be a road that crosses it. Undoubtedly the hijacker saw it as well. That's where he'll head. If we move hard and drive fast we should be able to intercept him by nightfall. Any questions?

Ray: Yes. How far do you think you're going to get with that gash on your head.

Fraser: ray head wounds always look worse than they actually are. Can you give me a reading?

Ray: It's your compass you read it.

Fraser: I can't.

Ray: Well neither can I.

Fraser: Well you'll have to.

Ray: Why?

Fraser: I'm blind. [Ray does that wide-eyed look of disbelief]

Ray: You're blind?

Fraser: Apparently.

Ray: You're really, really blind.

Fraser: As a bat.

Ray: Well why didn't you say something?

Fraser: No point making a bad situation worse.

Ray: Worse? Fraser, you can't see come on we're going back to the plane.

Fraser: But Ray I still have four senses left.

Ray: You can't see!

Fraser: I'm blind, Ray, I'm not deaf. I've spent my whole life in the northern woods tracking criminals I have a natural advantage here. There isn't a thing in this forest that I cant hear, taste, touch, smell, feel. It's a finely tuned ability gained from years of experience. So if you'll just stand aside I'll be on my way.

[Fraser walks into a tree]

Ray: That was a tree.

Fraser: Yes it was. A white ash. Fraxinus americania to be exact. Shall we?

[Conversation between Hamish and Welsh over the phone]

Hamish: We haven't located them yet and there's no sign of the plane either.

Welsh: All right I'll notify the family. You get any news I want it. Right thanks.

[On the top of a cliff looking out over some rather fantastic views]

Fraser: Any sign of the hijacker?

Ray: Uhhh, no.

Fraser: So we should start to come to a river valley. The trees should thin out. The floor will become more low lying. Willow, Buckthorn, possibly, infantile cotton wood.

Ray: That's supposed to mean something to me?

Fraser: Trees only shorter. Ah the river valley should be just about here Tell me what you see Ray.

Ray: Oh I well see trees.

Fraser: Good, good describe them.

Ray: Green mostly.

Fraser: Very good. And the river?

Ray: Well I'm going to bet it's just over the next hill.

Fraser: Perfect. Onward [Goes to march of the cliff but Ray grabs him]

Ray: Oh not a good idea, okay? Not a good idea. Just wait here for me all right? Okay I say westwards, Ethan Edwards, hand on shoulder.

Fraser: I can feel the sun on the left hand side of my nose

Ray: Ahh Fraser, there is no sun.

Fraser: What time is it Ray?

Ray: It's uh one thirty.

Fraser: I think you're a little off.

Ray: Hehe. How do you know that?

Fraser: Because of the sun on my nose.

Ray: There is no sun on your nose.

Fraser: Ray will you just check the compass, even an error of one or two degrees could put us hundreds of miles off course.

Ray: I know that, I'm not an idiot.

Fraser: Well I'm not saying you are.

Ray: OK good. And by the way I have gone camping before.

Fraser: You have not gone::

Ray: I have too.

Fraser: When?

Ray: When I was a kid.

Fraser: With who?

Ray: My Dad and to prove a point we are heading west..see... of course not what was I thinking. [Fraser starts to walk off cliff] Fraser!

Fraser: Ray you all right?

Ray: Yeah you, okay?

Fraser: Oh I'm fine, next time watch where you're going please. You could get us both killed.

[Deeper into the forest --note it is daylight.]

Ray: I think we should take a break.

Fraser: I feel perfectly fresh Ray.

Ray: No-no-no It's getting really dark now I think we should make camp.

Fraser: You know Ray, wise men walk while fools sleep.

Ray: Who said anything about sleep I just like to see where I'm going.

Fraser: It means nothing to me.

Ray: I realize that but I don't want to track this guy by moon light.

Fraser: There are strange things done in the midnight sun by the men who::

Ray: Toil for gold Yeah I heard that one and then they shot that Sam McGee guy. I told you I've been camping before.

Fraser: Moil Ray and they cremated him. It was Dan McGrue that they shot.

Ray: Did they get the guy?

Fraser: It's a poem Ray.

Ray: Oh ... moil huh?

Fraser: Yes moil not toil.

Ray: Ahh moil, toil who cares.

Fraser: Robert Service apparently.

Ray: Who's he?

Fraser: The poet. [falls over again]

Ray: We're lost.

Fraser: No we're not we just don't know where we are.

Ray: Like there's a difference?

Fraser: Well being lost is usually accompanied by a feeling of panic, Ray.

Ray: Are you saying I'm panicking?

Fraser: On the contrary. You see Ray, people who are lost, panic. They walk aimlessly in the woods very often in circles until eventually well they die, either from starvation or from lack of water. Now we by comparison, we have remained calm. Now you see this is the secret to surviving in the woods, remaining-- Ray I smell something. I smell fuel. Burnt plastic...metal.. what is it?

Ray: It's a plane crash.

Fraser: My God, Ray another plane crash, what are the odds?

Ray: It's our plane crash, you moron we've been going around in circles this whole time. What's the matter with you? Get down, get down, get down! [Hijacker fires shots at them]

Fraser: I'm going to handle this Ray, in the name of the Royal Canadian Mounted Police I... [more shots]

Ray: I don't think he heard you.

Fraser: Good shooting Ray, let's hope he's alive to testify.

[Hijacker runs off]

[Ray starts scavenging through the wreckage]

Ray: OK let's see what the hijacker left us. Well, tube of toothpaste. [tosses it away] Sun screen. [tosses it away] Oh here's something we can use... Haemorrhoid paste. [tosses it away]

Fraser: I almost had him.

Ray: A breath mint. I suppose we could boil it. [puts it in his pocket]

Fraser: Text book situation maybe he heard us approach.

Ray: Dief's got peanuts... here Dief. You didn't really think he'd surrender did you?

Fraser: Well not with you firing at him.

Ray: Oh yeah you're right next Time I'll just let him shoot us.

Fraser: There won't be a next time Ray, he only came back to the plane for provisions [Fraser is putting a bandage on his head] could you give me a hand here please?...He's on the run now and he knows we are on his trail. Now he doesn't know you're out of bullets but he must know that even a minor wound will slow him down. He won't risk open confrontation.

Ray: Fraser the guy's got a 9mm sig saur with at least two clips of ammunition.

Fraser: We can still bring him in alive.

Ray: And how do you propose to do that?

Fraser: You know Ray, Sam Steele patrolled the Northwest Territories his entire career without ever firing his weapon. It was a point of honor with him. Rumor has it that he was buried with the weapon unfired.

Ray: Great let's go dig it up.

Fraser: My point is Ray, that we will use nature to our advantage. You see wilderness survival depends more on your wits than upon firepower. I mean for example, the beam from an incandescent flashlight is visible for up to half a mile at night. [Ray tosses away the dead flashlight] Now our man didn't understand that or he would have waited around for nightfall and picked us off one by one. Which makes me believe that he is not skilled in wilderness survival. Besides from which Diefenbaker would have raised the alarm if he had been around. He isn't.

Ray: Fraser I don't think we have to worry about it. We're going to starve to death long before that.

Fraser: Oh Ray, Ray, Ray, Ray with a little perseverance and a little ingenuity and a fundamental understanding of how to go about it. One can live like a king in the woods. [Fraser lifts a stone revealing meal worms]

Ray: No way

Fraser: Oh Ray, they're very nutritional. Far more strengthening than fish or meat.

Ray: You eat them then.

Fraser: Sh...Shhh

Ray: What?

Fraser: Shhh. I think I hear a nest of furry night crawlers.

Ray: Oh great.

[Night. Ray is attempting to build a fire]

Fraser: Ready.

Ray: Ask me again and I set you on fire.

Fraser: Understood.

Ray: I thought we'd agreed. You're in charge of being blind and I'm in charge of seeing. Any part I left out? Good. Now I can do this all right. So just let me do this all right.

Fraser: All right. All right. Wait a minute. Wait a minute. Ray! I think I know what happened today.

Ray: Great.

Fraser: One of my legs is probably fractionally, just a little bit longer than the other one you see. Which caused us to walk in a giant circle. I should have taken this into account. Ray. Measure my legs.

Ray: I'm not going to measure your legs.

Fraser: Hey you know what?

Ray: What?

Fraser: I think the head injury's thrown me off a tad.

Ray: I'd say just a little more than a tad.

Fraser: You know what I'm guessing... I'm guessing the blow I received caused a subdural hematoma the resulting swelling of the anterior cerebrum put pressure on the optic nerve. Well at least it's not getting any worse. If I became disorientated, we'd really be in a pickle. ]Fraser falls into fire] Ray if you're going to insist on moving this thing you really should tell a body.

Ray: Fraser I'm not--

Fraser: No. No need to apologise Steve.

Ray: Steve?

Fraser: What?

Ray: You just called me Steve.

Fraser: I most certainly did not.

Ray: You did too.

Fraser: You're not hyperventilating, are you?

Ray: Fraser, you just fell on the fire and you killed it.

Fraser: I did not, you were blowing too hard and you need more tinder.

Ray: Fine you want to be in charge, you want to do everything, hero man, you start the fire [Ray marches off]

Robert: You're never going to teach him how to start a fire that way.

Fraser: Well I believe he thinks we're going to die out here and not without justification.

Robert: Well he's right you've got yourself into one hell of a predicament.

Fraser: Well it was hardly of my making was it?

Robert: Umm grubs.. [Sticks a grub in his mouth] You could have reversed the choke settings.

Fraser: What?

Robert: You could have reversed the choke settings then the engines would have started.

Fraser: Well why didn't you tell me that?

Robert: You always hate it when I interfere.

Fraser: Interfere?

Robert: All right.. all right.. you're going have to move fast and drive hard if you're going to bring this man in -- alive. Now for all we know he's left a trail of bodies from here to the circle. Hunters, miners, sodbusters

Fraser: Dad

Robert: Poachers, Claim stakers --

Fraser :Dad

Robert: A whole canoe full of Coureur de Bois.

Fraser: DAD, I don't know if it's escaped your attention but just recently I received a massive blow to my head.

Robert: Yeah well you've still got a few good hours left in you. Go get him.

Fraser: What?

Robert: Go get your man.

Fraser: Oh good I'm glad you brought that up. Would you explain to me please just once and for all explain to me, why is it we always have to get our man?

Robert: Well... it's the motto, son.

Fraser: It is not.

Robert: It is.

Fraser: It is not. It is definitely not our motto. Our motto actually is 'Maintain the Right'

Robert: Maintain the Right?

Fraser: Maintain the Right. Now what you're saying is we're supposed to pursue people to the ends of the earth for a motto that isn't even our motto.

Robert[muttering]: Well must be the new one then the old one used to be just go get your man or bring him back alive.. or just something... go get him...[Wanders off]

Fraser: Where are you going? Where are you going?

Ray: I'm not going anywhere I'm coming back.

Fraser: Ah.

Ray: Talking to yourself?

Fraser: Evidently.

Ray: You have those matches? Great, it's getting cold.

Fraser: Um.

Ray: [Tries to light fire] Damn it.

Fraser: The wood's damp. Matches may not be the solution. You know Ray, my father taught me how to build a fire when I was 6 years old. He took me out into the woods, gave me a piece of flint and a hunk of granite and he walked away without turning back.

Ray: You know how to make a fire out of stones.

Fraser: You know the funny thing, I have absolutely no memory of the fire itself but I have this very vivid memory of the darkness and knowing that I was all alone.

Ray: My Dad wasn't a father and son type of guy.

Fraser: He took you camping.

Ray: Yeah...well...of course he took me camping but the one thing he did teach me was how to look out for number one.

Fraser: A police officer puts others first.

Ray: My father hated cops.

Fraser: Where are you going?

Ray: Oh I'm going to go get some of those dry sticks.

Fraser: Ah.

Ray: And maybe some rocks.

Fraser: Good. Dad? [No answer] Good.

[We rejoin Ray a little way from the campsite, Ray's dead father appears]

Pop: I heard that.

Ray: Nobody's talking to you.

Pop: You tell a stranger something like that about your family?

Ray: He's not a stranger he's my friend.

Pop: Oh some friend... he's loony tunes. You should cut him loose.

Ray: I owe him.

Pop: You owe nobody. He's going to get you killed.

Ray: It's always the way it is with you, Pop, ain't it? Just you, screw the rest of the world huh?

Pop: Something wrong with that?

[Back at the camp site Ray hands matches to Fraser]

Ray: You do it.

[Fraser drops a single match from a height and the fire leaps into life]

Fraser: Yeah once you learn you never forget.

[Cut to Frannie stood on the porch of the Vecchio house. Welsh is there but no one says anything then back to Fraser and Ray]

Ray: I can't believe I did that. I can still feel them movin' around in there.

Fraser: It was a good meal Ray.

Ray: You need another blanket?

Fraser: No. I'll go get some rest. We're going to have to double our pace if we want to catch him tomorrow.

Ray: Benny, have you taken a look at yourself recently?

Fraser: Well I can't very well do that can I Steve.

Ray: Ray.

Fraser: What?

Ray: Never mind. You know I'd better wake you up every couple of hours or so.

Fraser: Good night [Mutters something in his sleep. Dief howls]

Ray: Yeah very funny, what you think you're a wolf or something? [Dief joins them at the fire] If he doesn't make it, hey Dief, you're going to help us get out of here Right?

[Next Morning]

Ray: You're up.

Fraser: Yes. I didn't want to wake you. I've made breakfast.

Ray: No, no thanks, you go ahead. Listen.

Fraser: A search plane, someone's in trouble.

Ray: Yeah us... come on come on. [Fires flare gun] I don't think they saw it [Goes to reload gun]

Fraser: It's no use Ray, search planes fly in grid patterns. He won't be back.

Ray: Why didn't you say something. What the hell is wrong with you? That might be the only chance to get out of here alive.

Fraser: Ray we still have a man to catch.

Ray: What are you - okay, okay I'll pack up, then we'll get out of here. [Fraser laughs hysterically] What's so funny?

Fraser: [laughs a bit more] Well it would appear that I have lost the use of my legs. [On the move. Ray is carrying Fraser.] Ray if at any point during our trip I should become a burden to you, you would let me know wouldn't you?

Ray: Oh yes Fraser.

Fraser: And you'd carry on without me.

Ray: Absolutely.

Fraser: Without hesitation.

Ray: Oh in a heartbeat.

Fraser: That's good.

Ray: Oh and if you at any point in time should be feeling better, you just let me know.

Fraser: Yes of course... Oh Ray.

Ray: Yes.

Fraser: I'm a little thirsty.

Ray [drops Fraser to the floor]: You okay?

Fraser: Uh huh.

Ray: All right let me get the water... there you go...[Fraser drinks and Ray goes to 'relieve' himself]

Pop: You're going to give him all the water?

Ray: What's it to you?

Pop: You're doing all the work, you should keep it for yourself.

Ray: Get away from me Pop.

Pop: Yeah well don't blame me if you die out here...

Robert: He's slowing you down.

Fraser: He's slowing me down?

Robert: When I first joined the mounted police all the equipment we got was a paper bag and a pointed stick. We used the bag to boil tea and the stick was for killing game and if you lost either they charged you!

Fraser: Are you ill?

Robert There's nothing to be ashamed of son, you've got a man to catch.

Ray: Okay let's saddle up.... [to Dief] What are you complaining about... you want to trade? All right let's try to do this, okay? [both father's watch em leave. Pop looks at Robert like - well --

[Cut to hijacker looking at map. Then back to Fraser and Ray]

Ray: Tuesdays. Ma always made a big pot of pasta fasule. She started boiling the beans early in the morning. You could smell it in every room. It's heaven.

Fraser: Bannock. My grandmother made it.

Ray: Taste good?

Fraser: No tasted like a hockey puck. Hard flat unleavened I can still smell it burning in the oven.

Ray: What are they going to tell them back home?

Fraser: The truth.

Ray: It's a big responsibility when people rely on you. Ma always worries about me when I'm late home from work.

Fraser: You could set a watch by my father's schedule. Out down the first snow, back at spring break. Never changed not even once. Well until he died.

[hijacker finds the water bottle tab Ray dropped]

Ray: What's that?

Fraser: It's called a bola, Ray. The Inuit use it to hunt.

Ray: When I was a kid I had a sling shot.

Fraser: A bola's not a toy, it's a deadly weapon. It can bring down a good sized elk or a man.

Ray: The hijacker is probably at a Hilton sitting by the pool.

Fraser: Oh no he's not, we're closing in on him, now take this. stand up and spin it.

Ray: Spin it?

Fraser: Yeah.

Ray: Okay.

Fraser: Now when you get enough momentum let it go. [whoosh] Let it go.

Ray: I'm trying.

Fraser: Let it go *now*.

[He lets it go and it gets stuck in a tree]

Ray: Benny?

Fraser: Yes Ray?

Ray: We're in trouble.

Fraser: Ray. I've stopped sweating.

Ray: What does that mean.

Fraser: Well a person ten percent dehydrated suffers from dizziness, nausea, swollen tongue. At fifteen percent from dimmed vision, loss of muscle control, painful stools.

Ray: Where are you at?

Fraser: The inability to sweat indicates a loss of anywhere between ten and fifteen percent

Ray: What happens at twenty?

Fraser: Death.

[Ray gives him the water bottle]

Ray: Here.... easy, easy, easy. [Fraser finishes the water] I hope you're right about that river.

Fraser: [singing] Well I can't get off of my horse, all day and night I ride among the cattle No I can't get off of my horse, cos some dirty dog put glue in the saddle.

[Ray joins in] In the Saddle, in the Saddle, yes some dirty dog put glue in the saddle.

Fraser: [Sings] All the leaves are brown.

Ray: The leaves are brown.

Fraser: And the sky is grey.

Ray: And the sky is grey.

Fraser: Left my heart in 'Frisco.

Ray: San Francisco.

Both: San Francisco Bay..

Fraser: California.

Ray: Cal-I-forn-I-a.


Ray: All the leaves are brown.

Fraser: The leaves are...

[Time has moved on but Fraser is still singing... Beethoven in german.

Ray: Shh shh

Fraser: It's Beethoven and Shiller.

Ray: Shh.

Fraser: What?

Ray: I hear water.

[They come to the river. Dief drinks, Ray lays down and starts drinking. Ray must have gotten Fraser's first cause he is drinking from a cup]

Ray: Hey this is great. Can you taste this? This must be where they get Evian from. Most of the rivers round Chicago, you can walk on. This is really beautiful.

Fraser: Ray, it may be some property of the water, but I think I can feel a twitch.

Ray: Don't worry buddy. I'll have you out of here in no time.

Pop: Now you're thinking. You're going to ditch him and take the raft, that's what you're going to do right?

Ray: No.

Pop: Look a man would take that raft, a man would save himself.

Ray: What are you crazy?

Robert: Leave him, take the raft you can still get your man.

Fraser: Absolutely not.

Robert: They'll have you up on charges.

Fraser: Do you ever listen to yourself?

Ray: What?

Fraser: Not you...him.

Ray: Who?

Pop: Like I said, loony tunes. Now listen to me why don't you.

Robert: Do you mind?

Pop: Yes I do.

Robert: I know you'll do the right thing son.

Fraser: How? I have no legs.

Robert: It's in our nature.

Fraser: Look you don't just leave a man in the wilderness and hope that he'll survive... they don't thank you for it.

Ray: I'm not going to leave you here.

Robert: If they survive.

Pop: All right if you're not going to do it, I'll do it for you.

Ray: Get away from me.

Fraser: I'm no where near you.

Ray: I'm not talking to you. This man is going to die if I don't get him out of here. Now I don't care what that makes me but what it doesn't make me is you. Now back off all right.

Fraser: Ray, who are you talking to?

[Ray releases the raft only to watch it disappear down the river]

Fraser: Well shall we get in it?

Ray: I don't think now's a good time.

[Time passes]

Fraser: Well I suppose we should start walking.

Ray: You mean you suppose I should start carrying you.

Fraser: Oh no...Ray you remember that twitch I mentioned earlier?

Ray: Yeah.

Fraser: Protract my lower lumbar would ya?

Ray: What does that mean?

Fraser: Well just put your knee in my back and pull.

Ray: All right.

Fraser: Now you may have to really wrench it. You ready? on three. One -

Ray: - Two -

Fraser: -Three -.ARGH.

Ray: Did that hurt?

Fraser: Like a hot poker, but look, look I seem to have found my legs.

Ray: That's great, come on, let's get the hell out of here.

[Ray chopping trees down]

Ray: I got one Fraser.. I got one... Fraser look out.

Fraser: What?

Ray: Duck!

Fraser: What?

Ray: Now.

Fraser: Oh.

Fraser: How many's that.

Ray: Eight.

Fraser: Great here take this.

Ray: Toss it. [Fraser throws the rope aimlessly up into the air.]

[Ray is binding the logs together into a raft] Ray: Looks like we're going to run out of rope.

Fraser: Well we'll have to improvise.

Ray: With what?

Fraser: The inside bark of a poplar is quite good for this. It has to be boiled then chewed. Inuit women do it all the time. It's good for the teeth.

Ray: Oh I'll remember to tell my dentist.

Fraser: You know cedar roots make a suitable alternative.

Ray: Boil or chew?

Fraser: Neither.

Ray: Well I'm your man. Here tie this off.

Pop: Look at you. Looser. You never listen to me, you never knew what was good for you. You never listened and you never learned.

Ray: And when did you tell me Pop, huh? When you used to come home for dinner five nights a week, or when I found you passed out on the floor on Saturday night from too much partying with the boys?

Pop: Hey it wasn't up for me to talk, it was up to you to listen.

Ray: Well I'm not listening to you any more.

Pop: I'm your father.

Ray: That's right Pop, You are my father.

[A twig snaps, Ray makes a run for it joining Fraser once more.]

Fraser: Get down.

Ray: I am down

Fraser: Good.

Ray: Fraser, I thought you said he wasn't going to risk a direct confrontation.

Fraser: It would appear I miscalculated but I have a plan. Go on to the river and lure him out into the open using the raft as bait. And you trap him with the bola.

Ray: I can't use the bola.

Fraser: I didn't say it was a good plan.

Ray: You got another plan?

Fraser: Not at the present time, no.

Ray: Okay, if nothing else springs to mind I want to get something off my chest. *Go-go-go-go-go*. My Dad when I was a kid - *down-down-down*- used to hang out down the pool hall, shooting pool and drinking expresso with the guys and acting like a real jalook, which he was - *Go-go-go-go-go-go-go-go-go-go* - So I'm 10 right. I get this idea in my head that I want to go camping. I don't know where I get it.. out of a book or something.. but the point is that I just want to be with him, you know I just want to spend some time with him. So finally he says 'yes' and I go and I get a tent right?

Fraser: Is this a particularly long story Ray?

Ray: So my Mom being the sweetheart that she is, goes and gets me her best sheets, her really good sheets. So I get some wood cause I want to start a fire, right? But what I really want is for him to teach me how to make a fire. So I'm waiting for him to come, right? And it starts to rain.

Fraser: Ray - the river.

Ray: *Go-go-go-go-go* I waited and waited but he never came. So I go down to Finelli's and sure enough, there he is shooting pool with his friends. I go home I take the tent down and we never speak of it ever again.

Fraser: We can't choose our families Ray.

Ray: Fraser I never camped with my father. Not once.

Fraser: The raft

Ray: *Go-go-go-go-go*.

Fraser: This is perfect. I think we've got him where we want him.

Ray: Oh sure that's what he's going to think when he shoots us to death at close range.

Fraser: How far is he?

Ray: Fifty yards.

Fraser: Angle?

Ray: Ten o'clock.

Fraser: And where's the bola?

Ray: Fraser he's got a gun. I'm not going to leap out into the open and start flinging stones at his head.

Ben- Oh no Ray, I am. I think I can find his range with your help.

Ray- Fraser, you can't see!

**Ray gets up to find the bola**

Ben- I can see!

**Ben bangs his head.. and is knocked out. Ray throws the bola and it hits a rock above the hijacker causing a very big rock to fall on his head.**

Ray- WOW Benny, Benny?

Ben- Ray.

Ray- How many fingers?

Ben- four. What happened?

Ray- Oh you're not going to beileve this.. nobody's going to believe it. It was the most improbable natural phenomenon I have ever seen.

Robert- Good work son.

Ben- Thank you.

Ray- For what?

Robert- You got your man.

Ben- We got our man.

Ray- Yes we did, Benny, yes we did.

Robert- But I think he's dead.

Ben- Oh... Oh dear.

***Ben and Ray are on their raft. Ray is 'punting' them down the river***

Ray- This is good. A fresh breeze, a strong currant. We should make this an annual event what do you say?

Ben- Ah I would say you should watch the rock on the left hand side.

Ray- I see it, I see it.

Ben- OK now we're coming up on a sand bank, Ray.

Ray- All right speak to me sand bank!

Ben- No I would avoid it if I were you.

Ray- You can avoid nature, Fraser, you have to work with it. See we're perfectly fine

Ben- I never doubted it

Ray- Admit it I know what I'm doing

Ben- You know what you're doing.... Ray

Ray- What?

Ben- Is that a water fall?



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